Boston Stranglers

by 10:46 AM 0 comments
In 1990, George Steinbrenner was suspended for a season for spending $40,000 to a private investigator to dig up dirt on Dave Winfield. Well, the Plumpy league fathers had to take a similar Tennessee Mountain Landis hardline approach to bob squad, when according to news reports he payed assailants to intentionally tear the labrum of Durham Bulls franchise icon Randy Edwards in season 9 for allegedly "not leading the team to the playoffs" and "in order to collect a large Lloyds of London insurance claim." Bob Squad was quickly banned from Plumpy for multiple seasons, but has re-emerged, ready to put the Bob Knight squeeze to any potential future Neil Ried type slackers as he takes over the eerily named Boston Stranglers.

As indicated by his checkered past, bob squad is not one to take a passive or patient approach to rebuilding a franchise. Boston was more active than any team on the free agent market, picking up pitchers Barney McMillan and J.D. Yeats, while inking slugging RF Rondell Gardner, the man who stirred the drink in Montgomery during her championship years. A key trade also garnered top-flight CF Andrew Henderson to accompany slugger Shane Judd and OBP machine Zeus Strickland in what should be a potent offense.

On the pitching ledger, starters include the aforementioned McMillan, J.P. Pena, Pat Hernandez, and Ricardo Gonzalez, who form a solid major league rotation. Yeats leads a strong bullpen as the go-to long reliever, and is joined by closer Tori Spahn and strong set up men Sherman Borders and Al Unamuno, a Rule 5 pick-up.

With a revamped offense and a slew of strong defensive players, as well as a decent staff, Boston should edge close to 500 this year, with a shot at a wild card run. If they don't newly acquired McMillan is the consensus choice of the Boston media to be the first player throttled by bob squad in an attempt to "motivate" the squad.

ttjackson@yahoo.com

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Commissioner of the fakest fake baseball league on the planet: Plumpy Rules!!!!111

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